Come posso smettere di sentire che nessuno mi amerà mai?

Domanda: I’m lonely and feel unattractive. I have difficulties connecting with people. How can I stop feeling that no one will ever love me?

Risposta: Did you feel loved as a child? Our expectations of the world are based on our experiences with our parents. People who felt loved as children, usually expect to be loved as adults, too, and don’t get discouraged even if there is a period of loneliness in their life. People who weren’t loved enough or in a healthy way by their parents, expect a similar treatment by the rest of the world.

What we expect deep inside, we communicate non-verbally and people respond to that. People treat us the way we treat ourselves, and we treat ourselves the way our parents did. Of course, it can also be difficult to interact with other people in a confident and interested way, if you couldn’t feel safe to do it with your parents.

If you think physical looks are the problem, I know a number of people who are physically unattractive and believed that they’d never find partners, but when they worked on loving themselves anyway, and got busy making their lives happy rather than waiting for something to happen, they eventually found great partners. People respond to our character and how we feel, not how we look. At least people worth being with.

Potrebbe essere utile dare un'occhiata sincera alla vostra comunicazione non verbale, al modo in cui interagite con le persone e a come vi sentite in generale nei confronti degli altri, per scoprire se c'è qualcosa di voi che gli altri potrebbero trovare scoraggiante. Ricordate che le persone sono più attratte da chi mostra un interesse genuino nei loro confronti. Maggiori informazioni su questo argomento in Come superare il rifiuto sociale e l'imbarazzo.

We recommend our guided meditation “Heal Childhood Programming for Empowerment And Self-love” on questo link. It’s designed to help you heal your past memories an adopt a healthier perception of yourself.

Per saperne di più:

Sentirsi non abbastanza bene: come riconoscerlo e guarirlo nelle sue radici

Perché le donne poco attraenti di solito hanno matrimoni più felici

Trasformare il dolore emotivo in passione e ispirazione

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