Pourquoi les femmes peu attirantes ont des mariages plus heureux

Even attractive women are often worried about their looks. I don’t really have to explain much about it. Sufficient to quote someone from endless online comment sections: “I’ve never seen a woman who would be truly beautiful without make up.” Personally, I think it’s ridiculous. Many people wouldn’t, though. This is how being endlessly bombarded by photoshopped pictures can influence people.

However, there is something that I’ve noticed observing people in life and in my therapeutic practice: while attractive women might receive more attention, it’s often the average (and sometimes below-average) looking women whose marriages are usually much happier and long lasting.

Cynics might say it’s because unattractive women demand less of men because they want to keep them around. There might be some truth in it, but in my experience, it’s certainly not the detrimental part of the truth. I’ve even met some unattractive women with emotional issues including “borderline” syndrome; their husbands still treated them very well. It would seem that men who choose less attractive women as life partners generally have good quality values: they appreciate the essence rather than the surface, the woman’s personality rather than her looks.

In such a situation, both partners are probably more realistic and less concerned about status and appearance. This makes for a good start! Quite a few unattractive women told me about their partners’ kindness, consideration and patience. Often those are the marriages that are truly “till death us do part”. The surviving partner usually cherishes the memory of the departed one.

Pretty women are usually attractive to men who value their looks and popularity. They might want a “trophy wife”, or confuse sexual attraction with love. When we see a pretty person, it’s easier to not seek further than the surface. Such men might eventually discover they don’t really like their wives’ personalities – or might not care one way or the other.

D'un autre côté, les hommes en bonne santé et plus équilibrés n'envisageront peut-être même pas d'approcher une jolie femme, en supposant qu'elle a déjà trop d'admirateurs, ou qu'elle est peut-être gâtée, ou qu'elle préférerait quelqu'un de plus beau. Parfois vrai - souvent faux. Une identité forte et intéressante est beaucoup plus attrayante qu'une belle apparence ou qu'une flatterie.

Alors, mesdames, si vous ne vous trouvez pas assez belles, cela pourrait vous donner plus d'espoir pour vos relations actuelles ou futures. Concentrez-vous sur la projection de votre personnalité plutôt que sur la peur de l'amour. Soyez votre moi le plus intense (dans le bon sens du terme !) La confiance, la chaleur et l'humour font que la plupart des gens remarquent à peine leur apparence.

Peu d'hommes pourraient être attirés par vous sans votre maquillage, peu importe ce qu'ils pourraient proclamer en théorie - mais ceux qui le sont ont plus de chances d'en valoir la peine.

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