كيف تحافظ على دفئك الداخلي

Human inner warmth is a fragile thing. Even children who show or ask for emotional warmth are often rejected, ignored or even ridiculed. School, college and business are often brutal environments where people who fight for power are often the loudest and have the most followers, while more sensitive people keep quiet so that they wouldn’t become targets. عندما نكافح للدفاع عن أنفسنا، يمكن أن نصبح غاضبين وباردين وباردين – even to our own children. Many people extinguish their inner warmth while still very young.

It can be difficult to keep your inner warmth in the world where at least ثلث الناس معجبون بالبرود والغرور, in which a huge number of people follow “leaders” such as Trump and Putin not despite, but لأن they show brute force without compassion, consideration and thoughtfulness. The same world in which men who show inner warmth are loudly labeled as “beta”, while women are considered weak by definition, in spite of reality. Where more and more people flaunt their hatred and prejudice, some truly believing that’s what would “save” their tribe.

ولكن اعلم أن لديك شيئًا يحتاجه العالم بشدة. يسعى معظم الناس إلى مثل هذا الدفءمهما أنكروا ذلك. نعم، هناك أناس يسعون إلى استغلالها if they notice it. But you can learn to recognize such people. You don’t have to wear your heart on the sleeve, but you can learn to cherish it, to protect it and to nurture it within. You can أعطها لنفسك أولاً، ثم أخرجها للأشخاص الذين يقدرونها (أطفالك أيضًا).

If the world seems to be trying to snuff, choke and demean your inner warmth, wrap it around yourself first. You might find that while you cannot lean on other people for support, you can most definitely lean on yourself. That is precious. Nobody can take it away. But you need to recognize the value of your inner warmthبدلًا من تصديق الأشخاص الذين يحاولون جعلك تبدو ضعيفًا.

Warmth is not a weakness. It’s power. It’s what makes society function. It’s what makes humanity survive. It makes people happy and gives their lives meaning.

Don’t get caught in the traditional prejudice that it’s “women’s job” to be warm. It’s everybody’s job. Women need warmth just as much as men, and men can be just as warm as any woman. That doesn’t take away from anybody’s strength, quite the opposite.

Don’t waste your warmth on people who don’t appreciate it, even if you feel you should be trying to help them. You won’t help them if they are not willing to see it and recognize its value. Don’t push your warmth towards people, but let it curl up within you, let it seep through and لاحظ من يقترب من.

حافظي على حدودك لاحظ من يريد أن يتغذى منك دون أن يبادلك التقدير والمكافأة بالمثل (حتى لو تظاهروا أو اعتقدوا أحيانًا أنهم يفعلون ذلك). إذا سمحت لنفسك أن تستنزف نفسك وتستنفد طاقتك، فقد لا يتبقى دفء لمن يستحقه. نعم، قد تحتاج إلى استخدام القليل من الغضب لتبقيك على وعي باحتياجاتك وقيمك. لكن القليل من الغضب يقطع شوطاً طويلاً، ويمكن أن يخلصك من خيبة الأمل والمرارة. يمكن أن يعمل حبك وغضبك معًا في وئام.

In the meantime, brute force might attract more and more followers, until it creates enough damage that people will be forced to learn that societies cannot survive in such a way. Then balance will be restored again – until some new generations forget those lessons and have to learn them again. But every time it needs to be re-learned, something is added to it. Inner warmth becomes at least a bit more valuable. Evolution is slow, but ongoing.

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